May 7, 2004
The story starts in classic black and white as an homage to the movies of old. Dracula (Richard Roxburgh) in the worst portrayal of the infamous count in history, is at the laboratory of Dr. Frankenstein because he is the benefactor of the doctor's experiments to bring the dead back to life . Of course, his timing is bad and the angry mob has arrived to storm the lab and kill the monster. Dracula kills the doctor and fights with the monster, who escapes with the doctor's body, only to be destroyed after the peasants torch the windmill to where they have escaped.
an unknown killer. After finding escaping into a cathedral. Inside he who tries to kill him while engaging Helsing pulls out his rotating saw- and pulls him off the roof of the
Having also killed Dr. Jekyll at the to the Vatican. At this point we that kills monsters and he has no came to this organization. (Does
Next is a long James Bond/.007 Carl (David Wenham) picks out his
his assignment to save the family
that sound like Wolverine's story?)
scene where he meets with his own "Q"
special monster-slaying weapons, and gets
of Anna Valerious (Kate Beckinsale).
Being the last of her bloodline, Anna must find a way to kill the count who is trying to use Dr. Frankenstein's research and his monster to bring to life his own undead horde of baby gargoyles who hang in alien pods from his castle ceilings.
Throw in Dracula's three insane brides, his combination Ewok/Jawa henchmen, Frankenstein's monster who just wants to be free, Anna's brother as a werewolf, a carriage chase where a team of horses (carriage included) leaps a 50-foot bridge span and an Igor that made Marty Feldman in Young Frankenstein look more realistic and you can see why director, Stephen Sommers, might try to cover it up with action scenes.
With the constant bombardment of unrealistic action scenes leading to a fully animated climax, you can try to give yourself over to the chaos, but your mind can't help being distracted by all of the unresolved questions that pop up every few minutes:
When hunting a werewolf with a large group of people, why is Anna's brother the only one with any silver bullets? If they live in Dracula's old castle, why doesn't he come back and take it from them? Why does Anna grab a mace when she thinks monsters are in her home? If Dracula is indestructible, would a mace have helped her? Would it have helped against any creature in this movie? Why does she only carry a sword and a couple daggers? Why wouldn't Dracula kill all the werewolves if that was the only thing that could kill him? Why doesn't Dracula carry the Werewolf antidote with him instead of leaving it in a sphere of acid? Why does the acid destroy the iron portcullis, but doesn't hurt the glass and metal syringe?
If you haven't seen it yet, save yourself some time and money and wait for it to come to network television. Or you can always wait until it comes out in the bargain bin at your local video store, it's going to be there shortly.
